what confidence isn't

When I think of confidence I don't associate it with being gracious. Our culture has trained me to associate confidence with extroversion, pushiness, and self-promotion. But that's not confidence, that's just arrogance. Sometimes I meet someone like that and I perceive some rooted insecurities that makes them need to inflate their importance to others. Sometimes I meet someone like that and they really do think they're that great.

Here's the interesting part: confidence is essential to gracious living. I'm not talking about that superficial brand of confidence; I mean real, self-assured, at-peace-with-yourself confidence. Real confidence happens when you're okay with who you are, when you don't need to impress anyone, when you know what you believe and you stick to it. You're okay with yourself even when you may be the only one who is.

Gracious living depends on confidence, because otherwise we all would be too easily swayed. Gracious living isn't always the most popular way to live, and if you're not sure of your gracious decisions, you could be persuaded out of them. So root yourself, embrace your choices and make them a part of yourself. If you don't, your carefully crafted gracious heart could slip right out of your fingers.

This post is part of a 31-day series on gracious living. You can find the other posts here.