the introvert card

Last night after our birthday guests left, Josh and I tumbled on the couch in collective party-stupor. And the clock read only 10:00 p.m. So. We're those friends now.

I spent today winding down from birthday week. Birthday week was delightful, albeit mentally and physically taxing. We had a wonderful time celebrating our newly minted 29-year-old. (Remind me to tell you about that time around Thanksgiving when Josh didn't know that he was already 28. The ensuing crisis was all too funny to behold.) Tonight, Birthday Boy is off doing something adorably nerdy at a game shop, and I get a night alone.

After a week like this one--and really, a month like this one--I am ready to play my introvert card and hole up for the weekend. I have done absolutely nothing productive this evening besides load the dishwasher, and that only made the cut because I pushed off unloading the dishwasher until dinner time. Tonight is not a night for sewing or cleaning or list-making. It's barely the night for blogging. Tonight is the night for Parenthood, stretchy pants, a long shower, some cocoa, a book, and very likely an early bedtime.

So world, I'm playing that introvert card, and in my game it's the trump card. If you want to go and party, then please enjoy yourself. Tonight my party has a guest-list of one, and I'm loving every second of it.

chilly willy

I use many childish expressions these days: silly willy, chilly willy, cozy warm, chilly cold. I also speak in the third person not infrequently. I clap exaggeratedly and jam to Curious George. Asher introduces a whole new form of I-don't-care-what-others-may-think into my life.

All that to say that it's chilly willy around these parts. Not as chilly cold as Denver, but plenty nippy for Portland. We bundle up every time we leave the house, work that heater, and down that cocoa. No snow, which makes me a little blue, but I'm crossing my fingers for legit snowfall for our Colorado Christmas. And I guess no precipitation right now is all for the best, because then we'd be left with icy roads and that's not good for anyone--especially Portlandians.

I like the cold. Homebodies are primed for cold weather. We like to bundle up in sweaters and capitalize on any excuse to marathon on Netflix. I like to give the oven a workout, and I like to see my breath when I walk outside. Cold clears my lungs, my head. I like wearing coats and scarves, hats and gloves. Before I know it the brisk chill will be replaced with coldish rain, and though I don't mind the rain, I prefer the freezing cold.

So here's to chilly cold days and all those wonderful things we do to stay cozy warm.

some Sunday thoughts

Josh and I were called to work in our ward's Primary (the organization for the little kids), and more specifically, in the nursery (the 18-month-olds to the 3-year-olds). Last week when we were asked if we would accept this calling, my heart sank in disappointment. Yes, I accepted, but I felt so discouraged. All week I've felt that being isolated with the barely toddlers will result in me never making friends now.

I've been thinking about this all week, trying to find an upside. I first decided to be more socially proactive in making friends. I've never been that way, but I think I have to now. We have many young married couples in our ward, so there is so much potential for good friends. I really have no reason to not make friends.

More importantly, however, I realized that I agreed to serve because I have a testimony of the gospel. Not because I like to have friends, and not because I want to pick and choose my callings. I serve because my Savior asks me to. And remembering that changed my whole attitude.

a Wednesday night

Josh and I got dinner at Costco.

And then we streamed season-four 30 Rock episodes from Netflix on the Wii while we ate our inexpensive and thoroughly unhealthy meal.

And no, Josh and I did not plan to coordinate so perfectly today.

31 Mondays

I had a friend once who described January perfectly: it's like a month of Mondays. Exactly. Perfectly articulated. It's Wednesday, January 13—the middle of the month—and it feels like a Monday. I look forward all day to going home and watching "Gilmore Girls" and wearing stretchy pants. During the day I'm productive and participate in my classes and do my reading—I'm not dysfunctional by any means. But I'm a little homesick, a little unmotivated, a little blue.

It feels like a Monday . . . every day.

But don't worry—Tuesday will come around eventually.

Five for Friday

So I'm back at Catholic Health Initiatives today and potentially for a lot longer. (One of the receptionists is out on medical leave, so I'm crossing my fingers that I can work here for at least a few weeks.) Thank heaven it's a job, but as of right now, when I don't have other duties besides answering phones and signing for FedEx packages, I get pretty bored. (And for $13 an hour, I'm okay to be bored.) I think I can get away with some reading, which is nice; plus I can blog and read blogs (the company I worked at last week didn't allow access to anything, including blogger and pictures on blogs). I don't have anything in particular to say, but it's Friday, and I'm bored.

1. I've been watching a lot of Quantum Leap lately. It's a funny sci-fi show that follows the "leaps" of Dr. Samuel Beckett, who stepped into the Quantum Leap Accelerator. Now he's trapped in the space-time continuum leaping from life to life, righting what once went wrong. His only companion on his journey is a man named Al, an observer from Sam's own time who appears in the form of a hologram. (I'm doing my best to accurately quote the explanation in the opening of the show.) Anyway, I've been watching several of those reruns and start to rerealize really how dorky this show is . . . but I love it.

2. My temp job today is downtown, so I decided to be bold and brave Denver's public transport system. I haven't ridden the bus since my first days as a teller at Washington Mutual, but it's easy enough. I've heard rumor that some of the buses in the Denver public transportation are pretty ritzy, but the one on 32nd Avenue is not. Fortunately when I got on, there were maybe three other people already in the bus, so I got to sit in a seat by myself. I didn't look at anyone and just read my book. Sure it's a pain to have to be ready and out the door by 6:45, but the forty-five-minute ride into downtown isn't that bad. It's an excuse to just sit and read (I mean, Operation Superhuman Reader needs all the help it can get, right?).

3. The longer I lack steady employment, the more I just want to stay home. I've had pretty good days. I sleep in a bit, leisurely get ready, have some Eggo waffles for breakfast, watch some TV, read some of my book, run errands with Mom, talk on the phone. I mean, this is the life, right? . . . Oh yeah, except that I'm close to broke and still need to finance my last year of college. Easy Street will have to wait, I suppose . . . for a long time . . . a really long time . . . perhaps forever.

4. Sometimes I end up taking naps at 10:30 in the morning. (Reference point 3.) That's just ridiculous.

5. I don't get to pick my lunchtime here. I was told that I'll be taking lunch from 11:30 to 12:30. There are two things wrong with this: 1) Who wants a lunch break at 11:30 in the morning? I'm a late-lunch kind of girl. I figure that I can stick out a longer stretch of boredom in the first part of my day and then have to wait through only a few hours of boredom after lunch. 2) I don't need an hour when I'm off at 4:30. I'd rather get a full eight hours in and take thirty minutes for lunch, but alas, they're forcing an hour lunch on me.

Give Me Mountains Anyday

I live in the most beautiful state in the United States, the most beautiful place in the world, in my admittedly biased opinion. Vail was incredible. It was one of the most relaxing vacations I've ever had. Seriously.


I safely reached Vail a little before 7 and enjoyed a casual dinner of quesadillas. In the five days we spent in the breathtakingly beautiful mountains, we took several walks throughout the hilly neighborhoods.

We went to the park (where several years back Emily and I had a frightening encounter with a wolf-ish dog) and played on the swings.

I caught a photo of Sarah and John in true form: John is pushing Sarah off the twisting balance thing. Even in Vail we can't escape the match-and-kerosene combo that is Sarah and John.

And of course there were several cameras snapping shots of everything all weekend long.

I spent quality time with Max, Lucas (pictured below), Eva, and Miles (all first-cousins-once-removed). In addition to seeing Michelle & Co., I also got to see my cousin (Michelle's brother) Ryan for the first time in probably ten years.

We made several good meals, but we didn't cook so much that we were overwhelmed. One night we had homemade pizza followed by Diet Delight (a sugar-free pudding and Lite Cool Whip concoction that is absolutely incredible)--delicious!

There were extra puddings afterwards--I might have dipped into the surplus.

I can't forget to mention the games we played! I played a game or two of Killer Bunnies (the others played more), and before you think Killer Bunnies is weird, give it a chance. It's weird, but awesome, though granted a little cultish.

The best game of the trip (and perhaps the best game ever): Bananagrams. (Check out Mom's post a while back about the game.) One round, my brain shut down, and all I could come up with is shown below. Ha. However, I had a few stellar rounds: phonetic and brattiest made their way into a couple of my spreads.

We also caroused Vail Village one day. Half the shops were closed because of the off-season, but we managed to find a few thrilling finds, including a boutique called Roxy and a cosmetics store called the CosBar. I'm such a sucker for makeup.

I tried several times to capture a good SP with four-year-old Eva; however I didn't have much success. This picture accurately portrays my frustrated attempts.

Vail earned itself a bump up the coolness scale when I noticed in the grocery store that the express-lane signs said "15 Items or Fewer" instead of "15 Items or Less." Thanks for adhering to proper usage, Vail Safeway. (I don't know if other Safeways have this; probably, but Vail is where I noticed it.)

We watched movies (including both Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea), I cross-stitched, and we watched the 24 season finale and the American Idol performance final (YAY for Kris!!!!!!). I didn't feel guilty about watching three movies in a day or drinking more than one soda in an afternoon. I napped; I slept in; I even went to bed early a couple nights.

I wasn't quite ready to come back, but I am grateful to have fully utilized this vacation for optimal relaxation. And I'm back. I'll get used to life again.


It was a beautiful weekend in a beautiful place in a beautiful home with the most beautiful people I know. If someone offered my family and me a week at the beach or a week in the mountains, I'd choose the mountains, hands down. Mountains are magical--that's just the truth of it. Nothing can beat this.

best mom ever

I have the number-one-best mother in the entire world. Today is her birthday, and she is absolutely amazing. Every year we go around the table at dinner and say what we like about the birthday person; I called Mom this evening to tell her one of the countless things I love about her.

My mom taught me that it doesn't matter what others think: the only people who need to be okay with what you do are yourself and the Lord. I sometimes feel weird that my social inclinations are minimal, somewhat odd because of my deep-rooted homebody tendencies; but Mom has always reassured me that as long as I'm okay with what I do and the Lord is okay with what I do, then my hermit tendencies are completely acceptable and that I'm loved regardless. I have always felt accepted by my mom (and dad as well)--I've never had to prove anything, and I've never doubted the love my mom and dad have for me.

My mom is one-hundred-percent incredible--she's the most beautiful person I know. I love her more than I could possibly articulate.

just tired

I'm at that point in the semester where I just want to go home. School-wise this semester hasn't even been so crazy (however, that may be because I've started implementing the 10-6 schedule); I like most of my classes, I feel productive, I've read War and Peace for cryin' out loud. So with school, this has been a good semester.

Looking at my social level this semester, sometimes I've been down. I'm not so social to begin with--I inherited the hermit genes to be sure. Usually I'm okay with my self-imposed hermitage, but sometimes I wonder if I'm weird. Of course I have friends, and I do things--I see people and friends on a regular basis--but sometimes I can't help but wonder if I'm just a little off from everyone else. Emily's been good at reassuring me in my supposed peculiarity: she keeps telling me that I shouldn't feel bad doing things I like to do, even if it's something like watching "24" on my computer and going to bed by 11 on a Friday. I am friends with several super social people, so I try not to make that perhaps-more-extreme social behavior the standard. I'm hoping more people stay in on a Saturday night than I think.

But I'm just tired. I think I'm getting enough sleep, but it's that kind of tired where you're physically, mentally, and emotionally spent. I have to remember that I'm in that part of the semester when you can see the end but that end is still just far enough away to not get excited about yet: I feel this unique exhaustion every year, and every time I just want to go home for a little bit, even a weekend. (Plus it probably doesn't help that I haven't heard from my family much in the past week--oh musical season.)

To satiate my need for some interaction with home, Dad and Sarah are driving out to Utah today (they obviously aren't coming out just because I want them to, but Sarah has a clogging competition tomorrow up in American Fork). I have seriously been living for today when I get to see my dad and baby sister for the first time in over two months. Maybe spending a mere thirty-six hours (probably less) with them can help kick me into gear for the last stretch of the semester.

I'm just so tired.

left behind

Katie roadtripped to St. George. Anneli went home to West Jordan. Caitlin doesn't spend too much time in the apartment anyway. Emily laid claim on the car (very kindly, I might add :) ) and drove up to Bountiful. I am still in Provo.

You know me, though; I'm a pro self-entertainer. Give me Kraft Mac and Cheese, Gilmore Girls, and a stack of articles to edit, and I'm good to go for a three-day weekend.

I have not gone total hermit, however; I've seen Katelyn Friday, Saturday, and today, and Brooke has come over a couple of times.

An apartment with half of its tenants gone is a quiet apartment: it's ShamWow. This morning I woke up a little after 9:00, got ready, made some French toast, read my lessons for church (which I don't always do, however good my intentions are), slipped into my red patent leather pumps, and sashayed up to the Marb for sacrament meeting at 12:30. It was an extremely pleasant and relaxing morning.

I have one more night of relative apartment solitude, and I'm sitting here blogging, drinking a mug of cocoa, and watching the pilot of Gilmore Girls.

I'm okay being left behind.

back with Jack

The season 7 premier of "24" was on last week, and it was a two-night event: two hours both Sunday and Monday nights--talk about back with Jack! I wasn't able to watch the premier when it was actually on, mainly because I don't have real TV in my apartment (much to my TV-addict chagrin); however, Emily and I devoted our Saturday night to Jack.

We kicked off our night with a quick jaunt to Shade, where they were having a 25 percent off sale on everything that was already on sale--ShamWow score. Emily bought a few items for great prices, and I purchased a really cute hoodie sweater for only $11.98!

We then headed up to her room, set up camp on the bed, pulled up the episodes on the internet, and got started. I brought over my leftover pizza from Friday night, and we finished off the pizza (with the help from some Coke Zero, Oreos, and carrots) on the coolest paper plates ever: Arthur plates.

We started the show but soon realized that the monitor would still go to sleep if it the touchpad wasn't touched on a regular basis. We were watching on the bed opposite Emily's with the computer perched on Emily's bed, so the dilemma of the dimming screen was a definite problem. Emily and I put our brains together and came up with a reaching stick composed of the rod from her broken closet towel bar, a sock or two, and one of her faux gerbera daisies. It was supposed to work like this:

But even though the device applied the proper amount of pressure, we realized that the touchpad also needs heat. . . . Reaching stick=failure.

So we ended up putting the computer on our laps, which actually worked better because it was easier to hear and see. Ha. We should at least get points for trying the reaching stick, though, right?

This one is for you, Mom:

It was just a hermit Saturday night, so it's really not a big deal that we wore unseasonal and, in my case, unmatching socks. We got a call or two soliciting our social presence, but our response was simply, "Sorry, I need to catch up with Jack." I love hermit nights with my number one pal, Emily. :)

Till next week, Jack.

New Year's Eve a week late

So I didn't celebrate New Year's Eve a week late--I'm just posting about it a week late, mainly because I couldn't upload any pictures. I'm not really a New Year's kind of person; really I find New Year's somewhat of a pointless holiday that isn't too exciting. As I've iterated in previous posts, I hate January, and so why would I want to celebrate a holiday that rings in January? . . . My New Year's celebrations of late have consisted of ordering Chinese with my family, watching a movie, and going to bed at 11:30. This year, however, was different.

Emily and I had a bunch of friends over for a donut night! What better way to ring in 2009 than with a whole of calories! (On the facebook invitation, I called the event "The Holes Don't Count"--it's my way of rationalizing.) Probably about twenty to twenty-five people came, but by the end of the night, there were only about eight of us, which was perfect.



After donuts, we all headed down to the family where John had set up Guitar Hero World Tour on the big TV, and we all took turns playing the drums, the guitar, the bass, and vocals. I think my favorite performance of the night was my friend Ben singing "Beat It."


Most people left during or after Guitar Hero, and then we headed upstairs to round off the night with a rounds of Nertz and Scattergories. We rang in the New Year and said goodbye at about 1:00 a.m.

Despite my general aversion to celebrating New Year's and my abhorrence of January in general, this New Year's Eve was fun.

a starchy, splendid Friday

Here is my splendid Friday night all to myself:

Yes, I do starch and iron my jeans. I know. I'm serious. I love how they fit after such an iron and starch, I love how they smell, I love how crisp they are, I love how they make my butt look. ;)

How better to spend a weekend night in your apartment that you have all to yourself? Read some Jude the Obscure, read a Conference talk or two to speed along the psychological recovery from reading Jude the Obscure, pop in a disc of Gilmore Girls, iron your freshly washed jeans, and top off the evening with a hearty bowl of Dreyer's mint chocolate chip.

Voila: starchy and splendid.

a rarity

I came home from campus, and no one was here. That almost never happens. Ever. It's glorious. I really did get lucky as far as roommates go: they all have their idiosyncrasies of course, and I'm not sure if I would ever spend time with them if I wasn't roommates with them (with the exception of Katie of course--she's just amazing), but to not have to deal with three extra personalities after a long day of work and school is just such a nice break.

With this time completely alone I have, I think I'm going to read my scriptures, read my Great Expectations assignment, and get a head start on my 500-word article due in editing on Friday.