close to heaven

In looking back through this blog, I realized that I never followed up with the story of my cousin Julie and her daughter, Ayla. Ayla passed away on January 15, at a little over four months of age. Julie joined us in Denver for part of our stay and had the opportunity to meet Asher. Her stay was full of tender moments, and we were sweetly reminded that heaven isn't so far away.

When Julie held Asher for the first time, I could see that Asher already knew who she was, Ayla's mother. He gave her big smiles and infectious giggles. We all agreed that Asher knows Ayla, that perhaps he is still close enough to the veil to interact with those on the other side.

Before Julie's arrival, though I was so excited to see her, I was hoping that Asher's presence wouldn't deepen her own pain. Julie expressed to me that on the contrary, Asher not only comforted her but also made her feel more closely connected to her angel babe. As we talked openly of Ayla and her life, I felt myself healed some. We shared both laughs and tears, rejoicing in God's plan of happiness for us.

Babes, whether in this life or in the one beyond, are sacred and precious. Though I felt it impossible, the love I hold for my son deepened further that weekend, for I witnessed the joy he could bring to a still-grieving mother. I feel the holiness of my calling to love and raise this boy. Both he and Ayla came straight from heaven, and both of their lives remind me that heaven is close.

For more about what I believe about mortality, heaven, and families, please visit here.