A couple of weeks ago I had some leftover Kraft mac and cheese for lunch. It did go for some time unrefrigerated, but it was only a day old. It should have been fine. Should have.
When I was eating it, I thought it tasted a little funny, but operating under the delusion that really it was fine, I kept eating. Eventually, after I'd eaten about half of it, I quit. Then my stomach hurt all afternoon. I left work as soon as the clock said I could, still feeling ill.
On my way to the train stop a few blocks away, my stomach started feeling more upset. Panicking, I realized that I was too far away from my office to run back. I looked around as my stomach ran out of time, and then I did the only thing I could think of: I vomited in a parking lot in downtown Portland. Not in a planter or trash can. A parking lot. A parking lot.
That was a low moment.
***
Fast forward to tonight. Last week we bought one of Costco's prepared food items to keep on hand for dinner. We had a steak-and-mashed-potatoes option last month and were impressed. Tonight when the chicken alfredo finished heating up in the oven, we tucked in, ready for some easy and tasty food. After only a couple of bites, however, I commented that the seasoning tasted a little funny. Then after another bite, the funny taste found definition: my mac-and-cheese disaster flashed in my mind, the picture of the soiled asphalt appearing clearly. I spat out my chicken and refused to eat another bite.
And that is why I couldn't finish my dinner tonight.
{To end on a funnier note, when I got sick in the Portland parking lot, a nice teenage boy stopped and asked if I was okay. I expressed concern about the state of the asphalt and asked if there was any city officer I could notify of the mess. I felt so trashy leaving my lunch there. The boy didn't look too sure of my question, but kindly answered, "Well, it does rain a lot here." Let's be so glad for that.}
8 comments:
I had that too! That apologetic feeling for throwing up in a public place, I mean. I threw up in the parking lot at work a couple weeks ago. And it makes you feel GUILTY! We were forced by our bodies to throw up in an inconvenient place, and then we have to worry about what was left behind. I hope that makes us extra good people. I think I raccoon ate mine. Maybe yours help keep another creature alive for another day? Gross/comforting? Haha
To be clear: I don't find it funny that you got sick. I'm sorry about that. But this post is dang funny.
I'm always glad to hear about nice teenage boys. You just never know.
When I was in labor with Max, I threw up in front of a restaurant. I know.
p.s. Too bad those Costco containers are so big, eh? Looks like Josh will be eating a lot of chicken alfredo for lunch.
Upset stomachs in public places are not fun. I'm sorry you were ill.
dude... you're so pregnant.
oh, charlotte! i'm sooooo sorry! you handled it well though, with class!!
xoxo
s
I'm happy to report that I don't think I have ever publicly vomited. His comment about it raining a lot made me laugh.
You're not, are you?
You left out the funniest part--about the teenage boy taking you into the arcade (or wherever) where they carded you before you could use the bathroom, and the bouncer guy told you "Not to mess it up." Now THAT's the kind of guy you want around when you're sick.
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