Yes, the official honeymoon is over and has been for a while now. But as is typical with newlyweds, the honeymoon phase continues into the everyday life of early marriage. And yes, I'm loving it. And yes, I do know that marriage isn't all honeymooning, that life will get hard and both Josh and I will have to work harder at our marriage. I know that.
But I also know that I am going to live up every moment of newlywed honeymooning. When marriage gets a little harder, I want to be able to look back at this time and draw strength from it, find courage in the deepening love I feel for Josh every day. I want to have reminders that things really can be this good.
And really, a marriage worked and honed and refined over years and decades can produce so much more happiness than a week-long honeymoon, or even the newlywed bliss. My grandma said that you fall in and out of love all the time in marriage—she had been steadily in love with my grandpa for the last several years of her life. Her marriage proves to me that the work is worth it.
So here's my honeymooning philosophy: I will revel in the honeymoon phase, soak it up, and love it completely. I will also remember that the happiness I feel now isn't the most I can feel. A well-worn, worked-at marriage will bring a new happiness to me, one more lasting and substantial. Even in newlywed rapture, the "best is yet to be."
Sure, the honeymoon won't last forever, but my marriage will. And that's what matters.
5 comments:
I like your thinking...
This is excellent and wise perspective from someone in the honeymoon phase of marriage! I wish I had started out with your grandma's advice and with this perspective.
My husband and I have been married for five and a half years. About a year into our marriage one of his cousin's daughters asked us if we had kids (no) and if we were still newlyweds and that's why (uhhh). His cousin answered, "You're newlyweds until you have kids."
Five and half years later we're expecting a baby in April. I think we got an extra long newlywed phase, but I think you can choose to overlook faults, see the good in each other and feel that warm fuzzy giddy love feeling as long as you'd like. Times do get hard, but honestly, adjusting to married life is pretty tricky in its own right, yet you still are considered newlywed. I think it's all in choosing to see it in a rosy light.
I love this post! I love that picture of you and Josh. I love you and Josh!
There is a lot of wisdom in this post, Charlotte. And in Deidra's comment! I think you're off to a great start.
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