Josh and I were called to work in our ward's Primary (the organization for the little kids), and more specifically, in the nursery (the 18-month-olds to the 3-year-olds). Last week when we were asked if we would accept this calling, my heart sank in disappointment. Yes, I accepted, but I felt so discouraged. All week I've felt that being isolated with the barely toddlers will result in me never making friends now.
I've been thinking about this all week, trying to find an upside. I first decided to be more socially proactive in making friends. I've never been that way, but I think I have to now. We have many young married couples in our ward, so there is so much potential for good friends. I really have no reason to not make friends.
More importantly, however, I realized that I agreed to serve because I have a testimony of the gospel. Not because I like to have friends, and not because I want to pick and choose my callings. I serve because my Savior asks me to. And remembering that changed my whole attitude.
7 comments:
Serving in the nursery can be isolating, but also rewarding. I was called to work in the nursery when Logan was that age. I remember feeling very discouraged because at the time Josh was wrapping up his PhD and serving as elders quorum president. I was basically a single mother. SO I spent all week with my toddler and baby. And then I spent most of church in the nursery (with my toddler AND baby).
However, I discovered that by inviting friends over during the week, I could maintain adult contact. Also my fellow nursery worker and I developed a schedule so that we could each attend RS every other week. These things gave me a break from the graham cracker crumbs that consumed my life at that point.
I feel a special appreciation for people who work in the nursery. Every mom needs a break from their little darlings.
I feel your pain and can totally understand your feelings on this, but I'm so glad you remembered that you're doing this because the Savior asked you to do it.
I think you'll find that as you love the kids you serve, their parents will feel that from you and be drawn to you. Maybe you'll end up meeting many of the young married couples through their children.
I'm sure you'll be blessed for your service, and as you attend monthly Relief Society activities, ward activities and do your visiting teaching you're bound to make lots of friends.
You and Josh could also scout out some potential couple friends and host a game night or something.
Oh man, do I know how you feel or what! Nate and I were asked to serve in the nursery exactly 1 week after we moved into our new ward. We know absolutely no one in our ward. Except the cute little nursery kids (who, incidentally, are NOT always so cute).
They told us we would probably be in there for about 6 months, and we were counting down the weeks, let me tell you! We ended up getting released (last week) after only 4 months. This week I saw all the kids that we had befriended and I missed them. :-(
It's sometimes hard and often exhausting, and always alienating to be a child-less couple in the nursery, but it is fun to be able to spend the time with your husband, and hanging out with the kiddos (and stealing their goldfish and pretzels.)
Have fun and good luck! (and try not to get puked on)
Maybe you'll get some amazing visiting teachers to start off your friend-making!
Charlotte, don't be discouraged. I have held almost every calling a sister can have in the church and let me tell you that even though you will be a bit isolated you will love, love, LOVE nursery. They are the most precious little spirits and are so full of love. Just love them and you will feel the Savior's love in ABUNDANCE.
On the isolation...Jim and I used to invite couples that we wanted to get to know better out on date night with us once a month. Pretty soon we had tons of friends and were being invited into their homes. Be proactive even if you are the newbie...don't wait to be asked. After moving 48 times in my life I have learned...the only way to have a friend is to be one.
Nursery can be a challenge, but I like your attitude. I find that when I'm in nursery, I have to go to church with a different outlook - how can I help? instead of what I will get out of it personally. Sacrament meeting takes on a whole new meaning when you know it's all you're going to get just for you!
I think the experience of working in nursery together will be a good one, I have never done it with Marc. As a young couple, it will give you a new appreciation for parenting small children! And like Jill said, parents are so grateful for people who love and care for their children.
Invite prospective friends over for games and dessert!
I have never worked in the nursery, but my second son is about to start going, so on behalf of myself and other parents of young kids, thank you, thank you, thank you.
Our ward has a couple childless couples working in the nursery, and I always feel a little bad for them, but mostly really grateful for taking care of my kids during church.
I agree with the others about inviting other couples over for dinner and games. It is totally worth it. We were a young childless couple for our first 5 years in our ward. We have made some of the best friends we could ever have. We still hang out and play games all the time (only now our kids come along--our kids have learned to be very good at falling asleep at others' houses).
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